Is Boundless Love Real?
by Nikki Duncan
Boundless.
More than broad, built, or buff we want our romance novel heroes to be boundless in their desire and love. We want them to value the women they’re falling for in every way. We look for believable relationships built on respect and admiration for what makes their heroine strong as well as patience and understanding for the things which make her vulnerable.
As women in real life, we want a sexy man at our side and in our bed, but we also want those unseen strengths that drive book heroes. Dedication. Willingness to admit he’s in love with one woman. Commitment. We covet them with such conviction we’ll defend out decisions to read romance novels, and expect those qualities in real life, when others disparage our choice of genre or even us. I sure know as writers we defend it.
I wonder though how many people truly believe in the kind of relationships found in books. I’m talking the depth of belief we had in Santa when we were children. A belief strong enough to have us turn from something good that could maybe make us happy to instead wait for something great. The belief that has us asking, like Steve from The Wedding Planner, “What if what’s good really is good, but there’s something greater?”
What if?
Now, I’m not saying jump ship from a relationship because of not great moments. I’m not saying anyone should expect perfection or fireworks every day, but I do wonder if more people held out for greatness and then worked to keep it if we’d have more happily married couples. More successful marriages and families. I mean, sure, there’s nothing easy about love, marriage, or family. Nothing. We’re all a little dysfunctional, which if you ask me is what gives life color and personality.
But I still wonder.
Do you think people rush in too fast and settle for something that’s just ‘good’? Do you believe in a boundless love? Have you already found it? Or are you still looking?
Heart stopping puppy chases, childhood melodrama and the aborted hangings of innocent toys are all in a day’s work for Nikki Duncan. This athletic equestrian turned reluctant homemaker turned daring author, is drawn to the siren song of a fresh storyline.
Nikki plots murder and mayhem over breakfast, scandalous exposes at lunch and the sensual turn of phrase after dinner. Nevertheless, it is the pleasurable excitement and anticipation of unraveling her character’s motivation that drives her to write long past the witching hour.
The only anxiety and apprehension haunting this author comes from pondering the mysterious outcome of her latest twist.
To learn more about Nikki, visit her at www.NikkiDuncan.com or www.SensoryOps.com.
Nikki’s book SOUNDS TO DIE BY is available now in print and digital formats here: My Bookstore & More
SCENT OF PERSUASION is available in digital format only at this point.
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Hi Nikki! So excited to see you here on Delilah’s blog! What a great post! I’m sitting here shaking my head in agreement through the whole thing! I do think we rush into settling for what it good because we are too afraid of ending up alone. I have seen so many of my friends marry quickly and end up divorced a couple of years later. Boundless love sounds like a fairytale but I believe its possible for the simple fact that we all deserve it. Maybe that’s naive but I don’t care. I haven’t found my boundless love but believe that one day I will.
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Miranda, I know what you mean. It saddens me to watch people move from serious committment to another committment as easily or as often as they might replace their car. I hear justifications like “he just wasn’t a fit for me” or “I guess I need someone who understands me”. I wish people would slow down and take the time to wait for the right fit who understands them from the beginning.
I have one friend who after a very long time of struggling in her marriage is working on a recommittment to her husband, and him to her. There isn’t going to be anything easy about their path, but I’m wishing them tremendous success because when they’re good together there’s greatness.
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I believe in boundless love because I’ve found it. Ok, we’re not perfect. We have our spats. We don’t always agree. But we love each other deeply. We understand each other and after 32 years of marriage, the sparks are still flying in bed…hehe!!!
Valerie
in Germany
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Valerie, that’s awesome! Sparks are good in and out of the bedroom. Congratulations on that deep and boundless love. And the understanding.
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(((Nikki)))!!!
I love, love, love your post 🙂
You know, twice I had a chance to settle for good… both times, I didn’t. I’m sooooo glad I didn’t. Looing back, that’s all it would have been , settling.
I know myself more now… I know what I want and what I don’t… so, hopefully, next time, I’ll know when it’s not just ‘good’ but ‘great’ 🙂
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Really enjoyed your post.
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Ali, keep holding out for “great”. Knowing yourself is a huge part of finding the right relationship I think.
Sue, thanks for stopping by. Glad you enjoyed the post.