I am adopted. I’ve known this since I was old enough to understand what that meant.  My adoptive mother (hereafter referred to as my ‘mother’) let me know that my biological mother couldn’t keep me, but that she, my mother, wanted me very much.  She also said my biological father wanted to keep me, but that, as a couple, my biological parents couldn’t make it work.  That’s a lot for a five-year-old to understand.  She also cautioned me not to tell kids I was adopted.  Now, she denies this, but it’s one of my strongest memories from just before I started school.

I was very close to my mother growing up — whether that was a good or a bad thing is left to the annals of history and my therapist.  I will say that what finally drove us apart was, in part, my mental illness.  She got tired of having a sick daughter who was always needing to be rescued.  There were some other factors, but that was the big one.  She cut me out of her life.  That was twenty years ago.

For various reasons, I was never close to my father.  He blames my mother and her parenting style.  His own shenanigans during their marriage didn’t help.  Again, water under the bridge, and yes, my therapist knows all about it.

My Adoptive Dad

(For the record — I joke about therapy but will say here that I come by my mental illness honestly. It comes from both sides of my biological parents’ families.  Mental illness is extremely serious and should never be taken lightly.  I take my meds, do the work with my doctor, and do regular check-ins to make sure I’m coping. For me, however, humor is part of coping.  It works for me — it doesn’t for others.

When I was eighteen, I registered with provincial authorities to meet my biological parents. That was the procedure where I lived. Then, eventually, if no match was made, the government would initiate a search.

I waited ten years — which is how long I was told it would be.

Then my cousin told me the government had searched on her behalf. The result hadn’t been all that positive, but she’d come away with crucial medical information. So not a total loss, even if her biological mother wanted nothing to do with her.

Since my cousin had registered after me, I contacted the government — to discover they had an old address.  Eventually, they initiated a search.  I won’t bore you with the details, but about the time the government was searching, my bio mom decided she was ready to look.  So the timing couldn’t have been better — earlier, she might not have been ready.  That first meeting went well, and she invited me to visit her at her home later.  My dog and I made the trek halfway across Canada, and I got to spend time with her.  I met her husband, my grandparents, and two of my three half-siblings.

The relationship became complicated from that point forward and I lost touch — that was on me.  Eventually, from that family, my grandfather passed, my bio mom passed, and then my grandmother passed the next day.  My only regret is not keeping in touch.  Those siblings and nieces and nephews are lost to me entirely.

Okay, so that was that.  Except maybe not.  In 2018, I spit in two tubes and sent those samples off to labs.  23 and Me provided genetic information as well as a DNA database (watch out, they’re in bankruptcy — I recently downloaded all my data and deleted it entirely since I can’t guarantee the next owner, if there is one, will be scrupulous with my privacy).  Ancestry also has a database, so I signed up for that.

Awkward — bio mom’s extended family contacted me.  Very curious as to who this unknown person was — they believed they knew everyone.  She hadn’t told them about me before her death.  Respecting that wish, I asked the relatives to ignore me.  They pointed out they were nice people.  I asked for respect of my wishes — they did back down.

Fast forward to late November 2021.  Someone contacted me through Ancestry.  The last name was the same as the one my bio mom told me belonged to my bio dad.  My half-sister had found me.  Discussions ensued.  Ironically, I was nervous.  What if I was a disappointment? What if they didn’t like me?

I met with my half-sister first.  Then my dad and my other half-sister.  Things sort of went sideways in my half-sister’s life, and I no longer fit into that space.  I respect that.  My other half-sister has a lot going on in her life.  Again, I understand.

My Bio Dad

That left me and my bio dad.  He came to my town a couple of times, and we shared some awkward meals.  Then one day, out of the blue, he texted me. I texted back.  Those texts increased in frequency.  Now, it’s a couple of times a week.  Recently, he asked if he could come for a twenty-four-hour visit.  Understand — people don’t come to my house, and they certainly don’t spend the night.

For him, though, I was willing to make an exception.

Again, I won’t bore you with details — but the visit went well.  I learned a ton about my family, and he got a complete picture of my life — the good, the bad, and the…WTAF?

Such is life.

I don’t know how much longer I’ll have him.  I am also much closer to my dad than before, and I don’t know how much longer I’ll have him either. I’m trying to make the most of what I do have.  I try to share my writing.  I visit when I can.  I hold them in my hearts.

Okay — that was way more than you probably wanted to know. My point?  Being adopted wasn’t a bad thing in my life.  My adopted parents were far from perfect, but I’ve had a good life. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been and so no regrets. I just happened to have gone through Hell to get here.

There are tons of found families in my stories — people who support and love my main characters when their own biological families fail them (or die…lots of parents and siblings die in accidents and of horrible diseases). I like to make my characters suffer and then have them find love — in many different forms.

Stanley’s Christmas Redemption is one of those books.  Angus, the ten-year-old, is tragically orphaned. And sure, he has his uncle, Stanley, whom he’s never meet.  But he also has his counselor, Justin.  Who eventually steps away from the therapist role and into that of stepfather (because of course Justin and Stanley fall in love).  Justin has his parents and siblings, but he also has his co-workers with whom he’s close. And then Stanley reconnects with an ex-boyfriend and, eventually, their two families draw closer. Finally, Stanley and Justin foster Opal. Now, if you read subsequent books, you discover what happens to Opal (hint: Justin, Stanley, and Angus are part of her life).

Adoption often turns out well. Found family can be more precious than blood.

You can make characters suffer and given them a happy ending.

Okay, enough about me. I’m so grateful if you’ve read all that.  To one of your readers, Delilah, I would like to gift Stanley’s Christmas Redemption as well as the three other big books in my Love in Mission City series. If the winner doesn’t want those, I can give four other books from my back catalogue.  So let me know — is there a particular book that touched you? One with an adoption, or found family, or just some group of people who are connected in a nontraditional way?  Drop me a comment and let me know.  Winner to be chosen by Random.

Stanley’s Christmas Redemption Synopsis

Stanley

I have life figured out—a good job, a nice car, and an ex-boyfriend whose heart I broke. But then my half-brother dies unexpectedly, and I go back to our hometown to settle his affairs. A quick trip before Christmas. Instead, I get the shock of my life. Do I face this new challenge or do what I’ve always done—run? Or will I stay and get to know the most amazing man I’ve ever met and take on a responsibility I’ve never dreamed of facing? This will be a holiday season like no other.

Justin

I’m a therapist who helps people deal with grief. My life is fulfilling. So what if I’ve been single for years? I have the kids I counsel and co-workers I adore. Maybe I’m tired of going home to an empty house and not looking forward to another Christmas alone. But I’m not going to be taken in by some slick city guy who can’t wait to leave town. I’m not going to upend my life just because I’ve met the man of my dreams. Right?

This is an 85k opposites-attract instalove mid-angst gay romance novel.  Previously published in the charity anthology Secret Santa: A Romance Collection, the story has quadrupled in size with more love, laughs, and a touch of Christmas magic.

Buy links:
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09ZD95NH7
Audible: https://www.audible.com/pd/Stanleys-Christmas-Redemption-Audiobook/B09ZBM2GJ8
Universal link:  https://books2read.com/u/mV86x2

About the Author

USA Today Bestselling author Gabbi Grey lives in beautiful British Columbia where her fur baby chin-poo keeps her safe from the nasty neighborhood squirrels. Working for the government by day, she spends her early mornings writing contemporary, gay, sweet, and dark erotic BDSM romances. While she firmly believes in happy endings, she also believes in making her characters suffer before finding their true love. She also writes m/f romances as Gabbi Black and Gabbi Powell.

Personal links:
Website: https://gabbigrey.com/
Newsletter sign-up:  https://sendfox.com/gabbigrey
Bookbub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/gabbi-grey
Goodreads:  https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15456297.Gabbi_Grey
Amazon Author Central: https://www.amazon.com/Gabbi-Grey/e/B07SJVFX1M
Audible Profile:  https://www.audible.com/author/Gabbi-Grey/B07SJVFX1M
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/authorgabbigrey/