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In loving memory…
Sunday, January 12th, 2020

It’s taken me a little time to process. I spent the remainder of January 10th, after 1:30 PM, walking in a fog, making calls, meeting with hospice. The 11th, family descended. All my brothers, my sister, my son, nephew, nieces, daughter and her family. All inside one house. Most staying here overnight.

It was a strange day because my sis and I knew that while we had everyone here, we had to go through mom’s things to see what everyone wanted. Of course, her artwork flew of the walls. Everyone wanted a memory. I was left with a watercolor of a sunflower she’d done for me. We sorted through her clothing, bagging up what wasn’t wanted to give away. We parceled out her jewelry—so may mementos from my father’s deployments during the Vietnam War, later gifts, usually with diamonds when they had more money, because my mom loved bling. Treasures we’ll wear while we think of her.

The day she passed, my daughter was vacuuming the house after checking her to see if she was comfortable. Mom was beyond speech by that time, only half here. She no longer responded to our voices. I brought in a bright yellow washcloth to wash her face and began to do so, when I finally noticed she no longer breathed.

My sister, who had driven down from northern Arkansas walked into the house a minute later.

Two elderly men from the local funeral home came to collect her some time later. My son-in-law and I helped move her from the bed to the gurney. It seemed fitting that I should help lift her one last time. My SIL helped wheel her out to the hearse. One last gesture of respect.

Over the last couple of years, we’ve lost so much—my beautiful grandmother, my strong & kind father, my lovely mother. I stayed to care for them. My daughter followed me to care for me and them. I’m surrounded by loving family, and I know that was by my mother’s design. I can shed tears, not many, because that’s just not me, but once we lay her to rest, the work begins, because my daughter and her family will fill this quiet house, moving in to this sturdy home my father built.

In mama’s last days, she talked to my dad a lot. Long conversations that I only understood in snippets. He was waiting for her.

24 comments to “In loving memory…”

  1. Liz Flaherty
    · January 12th, 2020 at 7:57 am · Link

    This post is a lovely eulogy to her. I’m so sorry for your loss.

  2. Ava Cuvay
    · January 12th, 2020 at 8:39 am · Link

    Thoughts and prayers as you mourn and readjust your life around the loss…Those little daily habits that are no more, but a constant reminder. I hope they bring peace and happy memories.

  3. Keri Richards
    · January 12th, 2020 at 8:50 am · Link

    bless you and your daughter for taking care of her she and your dad will watch over you prayers of comfort and strength for you and your family

  4. Cynthia D'Alba
    · January 12th, 2020 at 9:16 am · Link

    What a beautiful and touching testament to your love for family.

  5. Elizabeth Andrews
    · January 12th, 2020 at 9:19 am · Link

    Hugs, Delilah. ๐Ÿ™

  6. Ane Ryan Walker
    · January 12th, 2020 at 10:24 am · Link

    Is is always painful to lose a loved one, even when the death is expected. Please be at peace and know your loved one is on to the next part of their circle of of life.

    I always feel like my parents guide from beyond.

    I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

  7. Linda Crawford
    · January 12th, 2020 at 10:36 am · Link

    Sending love to you and All your family ๐Ÿ’œ

  8. Ani
    · January 12th, 2020 at 12:02 pm · Link

    I am so sorry for your loss and praying for your family.

  9. Colleen C.
    · January 12th, 2020 at 12:20 pm · Link

    Hugs for you and your family

  10. Amy Fendley
    · January 12th, 2020 at 1:04 pm · Link

    I am so sorry about your loss. Prayers to you and your family!

  11. Caroline Clemmons
    · January 12th, 2020 at 1:46 pm · Link

    Sincere condolences, Delilah. I still miss my mom and she passed in 2007. Our moms are special and in passing leave a void in our hearts. Your post is touching and a lovely tribute to your mother and family.

  12. Diane
    · January 12th, 2020 at 2:18 pm · Link

    My condolences! Losing your Mom, no matter the age, is always hard on us.

  13. Pansy Petal
    · January 12th, 2020 at 3:40 pm · Link

    *hugs* My deepest condolences. Kind thoughts and positive energy!

  14. flchen1
    · January 12th, 2020 at 4:06 pm · Link

    Hugs, Delilah, and prayers for you and your family’s peace and comfort as you mourn your mother’s passing and celebrate the life she lived so fully and the legacy she leaves in you all.

  15. Pam Hartgrove
    · January 12th, 2020 at 4:22 pm · Link

    Sending thoughts and prayers Andy condolences to you and your Family. โœ๏ธ๐Ÿ™โœ๏ธ๐Ÿ™

  16. Denise
    · January 12th, 2020 at 5:07 pm · Link

    So Sorry for your loss. The Lord gained another Angel.

  17. Savanna Kougar
    · January 12th, 2020 at 5:56 pm · Link

    My deepest condolences to you. What a loving memory of your mom. Brings me to tears. And the photo of your mom and dead, precious and priceless. Yes, he was there. And they are blissful together.

  18. ButtonsMom2003
    · January 12th, 2020 at 10:06 pm · Link

    I hope you will find comfort in the wonderful memories you and your family have. I’m so sorry for your loss.

  19. Cara Jo (Wright) Smith
    · January 13th, 2020 at 10:05 am · Link

    Such a hard time. Words cannot do justice to the depth of feeling contained in these moments. My heart is with you and your family.

  20. Eniko
    · January 13th, 2020 at 1:34 pm · Link

    My condolences and may you find some comfort, with time it will come. We never stop missing our parents. HUGS to you.

  21. Ashlyn
    · January 14th, 2020 at 10:10 pm · Link

    Iโ€™m so sorry for your losses. Iโ€™m sure your dad and others are welcoming her home.

  22. Gail Siuba
    · January 14th, 2020 at 10:50 pm · Link

    You have wonderful memories to help you through this sad time. Take one day at a time and never regret grieving, itโ€™s natural and normal.
    Sending you prayers and thoughts.

  23. Shannon O'Malley
    · January 15th, 2020 at 6:09 am · Link

    Beautiful tribute to your Mom. Sorry for your loss..although it is hard taking care of a dying loved one, also very precious knowing you are there for them in the end. Prayers with you all as you learn to live without her physically here with you.

  24. Delilah
    · January 16th, 2020 at 11:46 am · Link

    Thank you everyone for you kind words of condolence.

Comments are closed.