10 Things Guys Would NOT Say to Each Other

Here are my top 10 phrases which I doubt two guys would say to each other (or maybe I’m wrong).

1. Did you catch Dr. Phil today?

2. I’m tired of beer and wings, let’s make some Cosmopolitans and cut up some veggies.

3. No, yours is way bigger than mine.

4. Do you want all my tools?

5. Let’s go to the mall.

6. It’s nippy out there, come on in and I’ll make us some tea.

7. I wish those Victoria Secret models would cover up more, they’re not leaving anything to the imagination.

8. Not into shoot em’ up movies, let’s see if there’s a good flick on Lifetime.

9. Let’s take that quiz online and see which character we are. My friends think I’mCharlotte, but I think I’m more like Carrie.

10. Do these jeans make my ass look too big?

Please feel free to add your thoughts and what you think is taboo in man-speak land.

Speaking of men, it’s that time of year again…Spring—When a Bachelor’s fancy turns to…Cheesy Pick-up Lines

I don’t believe guys really use pick up lines any longer, but I thought it would be fun to list 10 cheesy lines that some bachelor in an alternate universe may be using. However, I do think us gals have been the recipient of a cheesy line at one time or another in our lives, some of them were funny, hey, some may even have worked for a few of you perhaps?

My Top 10 Cheesy Pick-up Lines:

1. Do you want to have breakfast? Should I call you or nudge you?

2. Are those space pants? Because your ass is out of this world.

3. Love the color of your dress; it would look great on my floor.

4. There’s something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn’t have your phone number in it.

5. You’re so damn hot; I’d marry your brother just to get in your family.

6. If this bar is a meat market, then I’d have to say you must be the prime rib.

7. Stop, drop, and roll, baby, because you are on fire.

8. Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?

9. Your daddy must have been a baker, because you’ve got a nice set of buns.

10. I’m new in town. Could you give me directions to your place?

Gals, please feel free to share any lines you may have heard.

Guys, if you delivered a line, please feel free to share as well. We promise we won’t judge….much.

About Selena Robins:

Selena Robins writes genre-defying romances, with a sprinkle of mystery, suspense, heavy on the comedy, plenty of snap on the dialogue and heavy on the steam for the sexy. A chocolate guru, Selena loves to dance with her dog, sing into her hairbrush and write in her PJ’s. In love with her family, friends, books, laughter, hockey, debating and red wine (sometimes all at the same time). Selena loves writing sassy heroines and hot heroes (the ones your mama warned you about, but secretly wished she’d dated a few in her life.

To learn more about Selena Robins and her books, you can visit her website at: https://selenarobins.com/ or stop by and chat with her on her blog: http://selenarobinsmusings.com/

The Two Book “Two-fer” Contest

Don’t forget! This contest ends on Tuesday. For details of what you have to do to win and which prizes are up for grabs, go to my Contest page!

Sunday Report Card

If you’ve stopped by recently, you know I have a very full work agenda through January 2, 2013. Every time I count, I remember something else I committed to doing, so the list expands. I began this surge on May 1st. I thought it was 12 projects which made me nervous enough, but it’s actually 18. Luckily enough, I’ve stuck to my plan. 4 projects are already complete.

The current list looks like this:

4 full-length novels (2 paranormal suspense, 2 BDSM)
3 2 novellas (1 Delta Heat, 1 Lone Star Lover, 1 TBD) — Delta Heat: Fournicopia, done!
3 2 short stories — Red Dawn, done!
2 anthologies I have to edit (Wild at Heart, Smokin’ Hot Firemen)
4 novels to extensively edit & expand (it’s a secret!)
1 novella to extensively edit and publish — Dragon’s Desire, done!
1 short story anthology to edit and publish — Licks, done!

I’m making progress at last on the paranormal novel for Montlake. Starting Monday, I’ll begin work on the next Western for Samhain. It won’t be part of the Lone Star Lovers series, will be longer, category length, I think, and not menage, but it will still be plenty sexy with a suspenseful damsel-in-distress plot with a small-town Texas sheriff that will keep you turning the pages. I’ll be reading through more Wild at Heart submissions, too. So if you see me playing around online, be stern with me. Tell my I better have my pages done for the day FIRST!

Y’all have a great week!

I have one of those mini-books you find in the book store by the counters. It’s tiny, maybe 3″ by 3″. I don’t know why I bought it. It must have been my Writers’ ADHD (WADD–if it’s not an actual affliction, it ought to be!). I hate waiting in lines, and my eyes are always going to the racks of things they place strategically close to the counters for impulse buys. It has a sparkly cover, so I was sunk. This little treasure is entitled, The Woman’s Book of Simple Delights.

So, I’m going to open the book at random and pick out a “simple delight”. I need something to take my mind off what’s coming. Today’s going to be stressful. My mother decided to host the local art guild Plein Air event—it’s an outdoor event where painters set up their easels and paint the day away. It’s kind of like a writers’ “write-in” only writers are smarter. We meet at a coffee shop with AC running. These poor artists will be trying to find shade in 90 degree weather to paint their masterpieces. Okay, I’m not being snide. I think it’s really nice. I just can’t imagine taking my laptop outside on a day like today, but to each his or her own.

Let’s see, a simple delight… Okay, here’s one. Practice writing your name repeatedly with a fountain pen. Huh? I collect fountain pens, so that part’s nice. But what delight do I get from writing my name? Maybe when I was ten years old and dotting my I’s with hearts!

Can you think of some better simple delights? Maybe we should collect our own favorite secret delights and publish them ourselves!

I decided to go a little out there, and I’ve started a “hotwifing” series. Most of you are probably asking what hotwifing is!  I had to ask the same question when a friend of mine told me that several of my Courtesans stories were about hotwifing. And here’s the explanation: it’s where the woman in the relationship steps out with other men, but her husband (or boyfriend) doesn’t have other women. Nope, it’s all one-sided in the woman’s favor. Often she’ll come home to tell hubby all about it. They’ll most likely have some really hot sex reliving her experience. Of course, the couple has to have rules, things they can and can’t do, etc. If you want a much better explanation than I’ve just given, you can read my friend’s book: Hotwifing by Cody Alston. She does a much better job of it than I just did.

I found the concept very interesting. I fell into it by accident. I was writing the Courtesans Tales (specifically Triple Play in Yours for the Night) and since the heroines in those stories are paid courtesans, I figured they were going to have to do far more kinky things than I’d written so far. But for some reason, I just couldn’t let the hero in my story have sex with another woman. See, my heroine was supposed to be his total focus, and it diminished her if he actually wanted someone else. So I decided that he enjoyed watching her with other men. Sometimes he participated, but sometimes he simply got off on her pleasure. Then they had fabulous sex afterward. Even when she was with other men, she did it for him, to give him pleasure, always thinking about what would make him hot. I had a lot of fun writing that story, and others with the same theme: the woman has more than one partner, but the man doesn’t. In a way, it could be any woman’s dream, she gets all the pleasure, but she doesn’t have to share her man. I just don’t think women are built to share, but some men are.

So now I’ve started the West Coast Hotwifing series. It’s set in the business world because I was an accountant in manufacturing for years, so that’s what I know. And boy, are there are a lot of naughty things going on at this little company I’ve created. The first story up in the series is Revenge Sex. Here, we’ve got a hotwife who can’t follow the rules. And we’ve got another woman who’d love to take her place. Who’s going to get the man in the end?! I’ve also completed the second book, Submitting to the Boss. This one’s got hotwifing and a bit of BDSM! You can read more about Revenge Sex at http://amzn.to/tQ6E4g and Submitting to the Boss at http://amzn.to/H0Cpco.

Be sure to drop by my blog, www.jasminehaynes.blogspot.com, for more excerpts. I’m also joining a new blog with a bunch of lovely slutty ladies. Starting today, May 18^th, we’re going to have two weeks of great giveaways, so I hope you’ll stop by http://69shadesofsmut.wordpress.com/ to learn all about us!

Night before last, Two Wild finally showed up on Amazon. The book releases on May 29th. If you click on the cover, you can head to Amazon and pre-order your copy. If you’re waiting to purchase it, I’d still love for you to head over there and click on the “like” button and the “tag this product” buttons too! Every click helps other readers find the book. Thanks!

Hope you enjoy the excerpt! And if you’re worried that this is book 6 in the series, the only other Lone Star Lovers book that is related to this one that you might want to read first to learn more about the Logan brothers, is A Four-Gone Conclusion. ~DD

It’s double the trouble when two ornery cowboys come courtin’, Texas-style…

Lone Star Lovers, Book 6

Sam Logan’s hell-raising twin sons have a bad rep in Two Mule, Texas. All of it earned. When it becomes clear those two troublemakers won’t settle down without another nudge—make that a boot to their butts—Sam reissues his challenge. Find a wife.

There’s only one woman who’s ever held Mace and Jason Logan’s attention for more than one night. Molly Pritchet, their former teacher. She’s been too worried about a pesky morals clause to let them close, but they’re older now and ready to prove to her that some rules are meant to be broken.

Molly thought her path was clear: always a teacher, never a mother or a wife. Until she finds those two Logan “boys” in her backyard, all grown up and digging around in her business. More accurately, starting her koi pond for her without asking. Well, it’s about time someone taught the Logan twins some manners.

A little mud, a lot of yearnings she thought she’d suppressed, and Molly realizes she’s the one being schooled in the art of indulging in forbidden desires.

Warning: Two hot-as-sin twins romance their former high school teacher. Things are bound to get down and dirty quick as two bad boys tag team to sweep one curvy, sexy woman off her feet.

After being teased by Mace and Jason Logan, Mollie’s rooting in the back of her bedroom closet for her vibrator…

When she was on her tiptoes atop the cushioned seat, reaching to the farthest corner, she heard a sound coming from her backyard. A metallic chink, then a soft masculine curse.

Curious, she leaned back and tugged her lace curtains to open them just a couple inches and peered down through the branches of the mimosa tree, into her yard. The sight that greeted her caused her breath to hitch.
Read the rest of this entry »

Contest from Sheri Whitefeather!  Leave a comment for a chance to win
a free download of THE VAMPIRE PENDANT e-book and a Gothic cross keychain
to ward off vampires (or simply keep them under control, if you prefer. )
Two winners will be chosen at random.

FIRST TIMES. . .

Thank you, Delilah, for having me as a guest blogger.  I’m thrilled to be here and have to say how much I love your clever tag-line (Get in Bed with Delilah.  Everyone else has!).   I’m sure you hear that all the time, but it always makes me smile.

I’m celebrating the release of my 40^th book, but it’s also my first self-published project, as well as my first vampire-themed story.  Lots of firsts!  So, that’s my subject for the day.  Other firsts that all of us can share.   Ready.  Set.   Here’s mine.

First childhood memory:  I was two years old, and I was with my sister, Lanie, and Nonna (our-great grandmother from Italy).   I was chewing gum and I took it out of my mouth and tucked it into the dirt of a nearby potted plant.  I then laughed my fool head off, thinking it was the funniest thing ever.

First crush:  It was kindergarten and his name was Bruce.  I don’t remember anything else about him.  My first celebrity crushes:  Herman (Peter Noone) from Herman’s Hermits and Monkee Davy Jones (may he rest in cutie-pie peace).

First car I ever drove:  A 1969 Firebird convertible.   Fun!

First movie that made me cry:  Bambi

First song that made me swoon:  I think we’re alone now by Tommy James & the Shondells.   I was about nine years old when it came out (way before Tiffany’s version) and I imagined myself running off with a boy when I got older, much like in the lyrics.

First time I had sex (yikes!):  I was a teenager and his name was Dean.  And, yes, I remember more about him than I do about kindergarten Bruce!

First mentor:  This would be my theater make-up instructor in college.  He boosted my confidence and made me feel smart and savvy and creative.  My other mentors would be the throng of teachers who told me that I should be a writer.   I was quite young during those experiences and didn’t understand that they were mentoring me because I didn’t want to be a writer then.  The writing bug didn’t hit until I was in my thirties.

First muse:   A man known to my readers as the Online Warrior.   He is a romantic friend (yum!) and an artist and art model.   In fact, I keep one of his modeling nudes beside my computer.  Other people have inspired me, but not the way he does.  If you’re curious to see him, here’s a link    http://cheriefeather.blogspot.com/2011/11/online-warrior.html  where I posted his naked image.  You’ll also see that I plan to write a series of books he inspired.

First books I raved about:  When I was a kid, it was WYKNEN, BYNKEN AND NOD.  In my teenage years, it was two classics–THE SCARLET LETTER and TARZAN OF THE APES.  In my twenties, THE OTHER SIDE OF MIDNIGHT by Sidney Shelton, CLAN OF THE CAVE BEAR by Jean M.  Auel,  and RICH MAN POOR MAN by Irwin Shaw.   In my thirties, A KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR by Jude Deveraux .  In my forties, Kathleen Eagle’s FIRE AND RAIN and Lucia St. Clair Robson’s heart-torturing epic RIDE THE WIND.  And, finally, in my fifties, it would be Suzanne Collins’s HUNGER GAMES trilogy.

Now onto my current release:

THE VAMPIRE PENDANT is the first book in the Blood Genies series,  erotic romance novellas featuring vampire hybrids (genies/vampires) living inside antique jewelry and taking blood in exchange for granting wishes.

As a teenager, Tessa Clarins was damaged by a fire, and now the scarred twenty-five-year-old virgin has been made beautiful by a wish.   But there’s a catch.  Tessa’s wish is only temporary, and so is her affair with Anthony Dumont, the wildly romantic “gen-vamp” feasting on her veins and stealing her innocence.  Night after night Tessa puts her heart on the line.  But so does Anthony, leaving sex, love, and secrets in his blood-hungry wake.

Purchase at Amazon
Purchase at Barnes and Noble

Happy wishes, everyone!

www.sheriwhiteather.com

It’s morning, and I just caught myself in mid-yawn. Yesterday was cram-jam-packed with work. Today will be more of the same. I’m determined to get a couple of things off my humongous list this week! So no time for a lot of chit-chat. Here goes.

Out with the old, in with the new.

The winner (by random number generator) of The Glass Art Pendant Contest is…Rana Adams! Congratulations, Rana! Be sure to send me an email with your snail mail address so I can get this into the mail for you!

The Two Book “Two-fer” Contest

What can you win?
The following two books. Click on the covers to read more about them.

How can you win them?
Post a comment on any blog posting from today until the contest ends. Each entry counts as another chance to win!

This contest ends in one week, May 22nd!!

To start the conversation, here’s a question…

Is public nudity beautiful or inappropriate?