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S#$t happens to the Devlins
Saturday, December 11th, 2010

I babysat last night while the red-headed hellion (RDH) found advanture at Walmart.

While standing in the toy aisle looking at Fischer-Price toys for the two-year-old demon child, RDH heard a commotion coming from the front of the store. She cocked an ear toward the noise, but didn’t move. Then two Asian women ran past, hunched over and whispering furiously, “You mus’ run!”

The two women began to move the toys off the shelves as though they would hide in the shelves. She asked what was wrong, but they only shook their heads. “Mus’ hide!”

Then a hispanic woman ran past. “He’s got a gun!”

That’s all the RDH needed to here. “Fuck the shelves, let’s get to the back of the store.”

At this point, more people were rushing past, all passing her because she was in heels. She ran past a cute redneck next to the gun display and grabbed his arm. “Run.”

He looked kind of shocked—deer-in-the-headlights shocked. She ran past him, grabbing his arm to force him down the aisle. Over her shoulder, she shouted, “He’s got a gun!”

RDH caught up with the crowd and got in front of them, heading toward the auto shop area because she knew they had an exit door. She ran behind the counter, started pressing buttons to open the door, but couldn’t find it. At least the area was darkened. She hid under a bench and repeatedly dialed 911, only to be put on hold over and over—WTF? This is Boonieville, Arkansas.

Then three Walmart workers showed up. “What are you guys hiding for? You need to leave, you aren’t supposed to be here.”

Of course, it ended well. Some dude escaped from the county lock-up and the cops caught him in Walmart with a flying tackle. Over in two minutes, but where would have been the fun in that? Which begs the question. Why would someone escaping from jail want to go to Walmart?

RDH says, “Maybe he needed to do his Christmas shopping.”

Yeah, I’m sitting at her table now, drinking coffee, wondering how I would have reacted, if it had been me. Like the guy at the gun counter, she would have been pulling me behind her because I would have wanted a closer look. And because I giggle when I’m nervous, I would have been laughing hysterically. No, guess she would have left my ass behind.

5 comments to “S#$t happens to the Devlins”

  1. Shoshanna Evers
    · December 11th, 2010 at 12:36 pm · Link

    Wow, thank goodness everything turned out okay! Glad no one was hurt.

  2. bookdragon3
    · December 11th, 2010 at 4:25 pm · Link

    Why not go to Walmart? They have money. They have everything an escaping felon would need, including more ammunition.

    On the downside, they do have security cameras and some of the customers are even scarier than the felon and his gun. Remember all those pictures that kept reposting to your group? 🙄

  3. Delilah
    · December 12th, 2010 at 12:12 pm · Link

    Shoshanna! Thanks so much! Yeah, no one hurt although dd was badly shaken up.

    Bookdragon! Yeah, not the place to go for a hook-up.

  4. sue brandes
    · December 13th, 2010 at 11:45 am · Link

    That sounds scarey. I remember when I worked PM’s at the hospital and a guy came in the front door with a shotgun looking for his ex wife. Swat had to come and lock it down for about 3 hours. Scarey.

  5. Zina
    · December 15th, 2010 at 10:56 am · Link

    That would be scary, why didn’t they announce it over there sound system like they do Walmart specials that everything was ok. And you’re right WalMart probably had what he needed.

Comments are closed.